Couplespeak™ Blog

I’m Finally Back….

If you’re a follower of this blog you may have been wondering where I was all summer – why no posts?? Where’s the new material, any new tools or resources, even just thoughts?

The answer is: I’ve been having too much fun practicing what I preach to clients: nourishing connection with self, family and friends, mostly outside, nowhere near a computer! I’ve put away the devices, as we all should do with some intentionality, and practiced more face-to-face experiences. How can a cell phone or a laptop compete with a glorious, sunny 80 degree day on the lake with beloved family or friends? How can researching and posting about all the new resources for creating joy and meaning compete with the meaning derived by loving up the local shelter dogs each Monday? And what “work-related” activity on Earth can compete with days at the beach or the park with our irrepressible two year old granddaughter Anna and Old Soul grand-dog Barley? What thoughtful article or diligent new podcast could possibly compete with immersion in the magnificence of our coast, our mountains, our rivers and forests here in the Northeast for the measly three months of friendly weather? None!!!

Then, there’s the other knee with it’s own torn meniscus, amplifying a sense of needing to “make hay while the sun shines”, knowing the inevitable surgery is around the corner (successfully completed today), bringing with it mandatory vegging out on the couch and a perfect opportunity to get back together with all my devices, my writing, my internal world.

So, there you have it – iced knee on pillows, hoping for crappy weather to avoid FOMO, and lots to share once again with you, my gentle readers whom I hope will forgive my incognito, hedonistic summer and know that I’m finally back…


Don’t miss my next 15 minute BTR podcast on Wed. 5/29 at 8:30 PM EDT: “The Pitfalls of ‘All or Nothing’ in Marriage and Life”

Are you an “all or nothing,” “black or white” person? If so, you’ve probably created a lot of pressure for yourself with your unacknowledged perfectionism!

Tune into my next 15 minute BlogTalk Radio podcast and learn how this attitude and behavior can limit possibilities for connection, conflict resolution, and productivity, among other things.

In this brief podcast you’ll get some insights and ideas about how practicing “Grey” and “Some” can relieve pressure, and help you and your partner get to the things most important to you both. I’ll be sharing some examples from my own life, so you’ll know you’re not alone with this challenge, and hopefully, you’ll have a few good laughs on me!

Call into the studio live with questions or comments at 877-497-9046 at 8:30 PM EST on Wednesday, May 29th.  If you can’t join the live show you can stream the podcast anytime afterward at

Don’t Forget to Vote For Me in the Marriage and Relationships Blogs Awards!

A reminder that my blog has been nominated again to be recognized, now in this competition by      StartDating.DK, a Dutch online dating resource. So far, I have 66% of the votes, but not by many votes! If you enjoy this blog, learn some stuff here about how to manage yourself in your  relationships,     and want more people to find me and also get tools for better relationships then VOTE for me by clicking on the link below:

Thanks for your support!

Susan Lager

Don’t Miss My Next 30 Minute BTR Podcast on 3/6/19 at 8:30 PM EST!: “4 Communication Styles That Can Ruin Your Marriage and How To Fix Them”


On Wednesday, March 6th at 8:30 PM EST I’ll be airing this 30 minute podcast about a vital issue you and your spouse need to know about – the 4 biggest communication violations around conflict, their dire effect on marriages, and how, with some do-able attitude and behavioral adjustments you can avoid their negative cascade of effects often leading to divorce.

Don’t become another statistic! Learn to behave better in your marriage, even when you’re angry, disappointed, or anxious, and need to let your spouse know about that. Become aware of the ways you can either communicate in an offensive or respectful manner, especially when you’re upset.

To join into the conversation live with questions or comments call into the studio at 877-497-9046 and dial “1” on your phone. I’d love to have you part of a conversation!



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Susan Lager

I am a licensed, board certified pyschotherapist and relationship coach in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. Through my psychotherapy or coaching services, I can provide you with skills and tools to transform your life.

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